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Throughout time artist/ writers have created songs about the ups and downs, the good and bad, new love and love lost in their lyrics about relationships. Chapter eight introduces the reader to the Social Exchange Theory, which provides an insight into measuring relational satisfaction from an economic perspective. There are several components of the equation: cost, rewards, expectations, and alternatives. Even the best relationship at it’s most intensifying point has costs. No relationship is cost free! However, what one person views as a cost, another may view as a reward. With that said rewards are not measured equally. I believe the value our culture places on tangible rewards is misguided. Movies, magazines, media and TV have exaggerated and embellished stories of the rich and famous. They portray their lives as happy, exciting and fulfilling, all because of what they ‘ have’. Every day people in our culture seem to strive for bigger, better, brighter, faster. Acquiring ‘things’ seems to be the goal. My opinion is that it is more important to place value on people and relationships; passing your values and life stories on to your children and grandchildren; loving and sacrificing for another; making a difference in someone else’s life. These thin

gs will remain, while superficial ‘things’ will fade away. For me, intangible rewards are, by far, more satisfying and rewarding. They are the stuff that real joy is made of. And no one can ever take them from you. King Solomon, considered one of the wisest men of all time, summed it up well: “I became greater than all who had lived in Jerusalem before me…All that my eyes desired I did not refuse them; I did not withhold my heart from any pleasure…A nd behold, all was meaningless, like chasing the wind.” – “Don’t Go Breaking My Heart” by Elton John and Kiki Dee Classic. I smiled all through this video. This song portrays a couple in “ relational maintenance”, probably integrating or bonding. I love how this song depicts the kind of relationship where it is obvious they know each other so well. They can predict the other’s needs and be able to meet the need without the othereven needing to ask. They finish each other’s thoughts. There is an obvious mutual understanding, a reassuring love and respect that is so basic, it is priceless. “Partners develop unique, ritualistic ways of behaving. They may even begin to speak alike. As partners become better acquainted, their knowledge of each other makes overt requests less necessary.” (text p. 279)